I looked beside me and saw all of my friends talking about being graphic designers, photographers, nurses, etc. And I had no idea. I always wanted to be a teacher, but that burning passion just was never there during my early years. I mostly just wanted to be like my mom, who was/is a teacher.
I love teaching. But what I really love about teaching isn't the curriculum and subjects. What I love about teaching is getting to know my students, laughing with them, watching them grow, sharing stories, and making them realize how special life is, how special they are. That, is my passion in teaching. It's the students.
So when I got to thinking of if I could be anything in this whole world, what would I be? What would I do? I tried to dream of all these scenarios of owning my own non-profit. That is the only thing in my head I could think of as a dream job.
I read one time to figure out what you had a passion for keep writing down things you enjoy until one of them just makes you cry and your heart ache. One that hits you so deep inside that you cannot quite thinking about it. The possibilities. I loved that.
The real dream job in my head, I was always a tad embarrassed to say. Like it wasn't good enough to be my dream job. Like I needed something more.
I've never really cared about the money. I've never cared about the big name, the big title, the fame, or the fortune. Sometimes I wondered why I didn't.
When I was in girl scouts back in the day. I mean, waaaaay back in the day. I put down on a little piece of paper that I wanted to be a teacher. While everyone else put dreams that were way beyond our little third grade minds.
Thinking back, a teacher is the job I wanted. But it wasn't my entire dream. It was just a small smidgen (yeah, probably not a word) of the big dream in my head.
My dream that makes hot tears streak down my face thinking about. My dream that makes a fire in my soul. My dream that pushes me, encourages me, motivates me.
That dream is quite simply to have a family of my own. My dream job is to....be a mom. And to intensively love others. Help others. Be what my family has always given me.
And my biggest fear in this lifetime is not getting to do that. Not getting to do the one thing I have dreamed about for so, so, so long. The one I look forward to the most.
I am really just blabbering. But after starting our Bible study with the book One Thousand Gifts (which I HIGHLY recommend)...it's almost like I was freed. Like I finally got it.
And I realized what excites me most is the smallest of small things. The little moments that pass by that you catch yourself just dazing off smiling and thinking about them.
The moments like the smell of coffee in the morning before you have gotten out of bed. The sounds my little Piper makes when she is so, so sleepy. Seeing my husband dance around the house. The feeling of looking out onto the lake as the sun is going down. Fresh snow that hasn't been walked on yet.
Those moments. Those are the ones that I treasure. And make me realize my dreams are coming true just about everyday. The little ones. And someday, the big ones.
Please tell me, what are YOUR dreams?
13 comments:
LOVE this post!! You are going to be an awesome mom!
This was such a moving and honest post. The older I get, the more I realized that being a Mom will probably be my greatest passion in life. I love my job and I feel very lucky. I even get to help children. But raising your own just has to be an incredible feeling.
I loved this post. We did a similar thing in the college-age class at my church on Sunday. We all wrote our "big idea" on a large thought bubble to share and for our group picture. It was definitely scary. And although sharing my "big idea" with everyone was terrifying, what really had me shaking in my boots was writing it down in the first place. Because if I wrote it down, I had to admit it to myself. Because if I wrote it down, it would be more "real." And that's a scary thing.
There are SO many things I want to do in my life. Being a mom is at the top of my list, but my "big idea" was this:
Accept no limits.
This is beautifly written dear. Your fear and mine are just the same. It's only been two years since we married but I long for the opportunity to be a momma. We have our pups though and I wouldn't trade that for the world. I will have to check out that book.
But you are right. It's the small miracles take make us aware we are still alive and breathing on this earth and should take in every moment we have.
Thanks dear!
my biggest dream is to be a mom, and a family CEO per say ;)) haha
and it is my biggest fear that, that won't happen. but we have to pray and know that it will happen. IT WILL HAPPEN. =]
Oh, this is definitely a dream of mine too! I, too, fear not being able to make my dream happen. This is a great post, Molly. Kudos to you on sharing something so meaningful to you! xoxo
This is powerful! This is motivating! CHASE YOUR DREAMS!!! I honestly dream of owning my own daycare center one day to help little kiddos. My favorites are the little ones just because they are so full of life and so much personality.. I pray one day I can do that {currently I work at one my aunt owns}
I love this. I never really knew what I wanted my dream job to be. Well, I always knew but felt embarrassed to share what it was for one reason, even with myself. But the more time passed, the more I knew that deep down my dream job was to be a mommy and to stay home with my baby(s). Just a month ago I got to start my dream job, and is so sweet, and it is so wonderful, and it is so much better than any other job I have ever had. It is the best job. I hope your dream job becomes more than just a dream for you.
I just finished that book about a month ago and it rocked my world. I look at things so differently now. Loved this post!!
Great post!! One of my dreams is to become a teacher!! I am actually substituting right now and am loving it! There are the rough days, yes, but then there are moments when I remember why I decided to go to school to become a teacher. And like you, another dream of mine is to become a mom. I have seen so many cousins grow up since they were born and just can't wait until I have one of my own!!!
sooo when you want to quit teaching and open a non-profit holler at me. because that's what my "God sized dream" is all about also.
Just reading this post now, and I'm telling you, we are one in the same, lady. Chase those dreams! I'm just so happy you decided to write this down so that I could read it and remember that, ultimately, this is my dream, too.
That was an amazing post. It kind of brought tears to my eyes. I just got married last year and I am closer to 40 than 30 and very worried I might not get the chance. Good luck to you and thanks for writing.
Post a Comment